I am putting aside what was ready for today as I have been thinking about Lou Reed’s passing. And I can’t say that I was a fan. I don’t own any of his records and we couldn’t afford the tickets to his concert in Arles’ Antique Theatre a few years back. But I am an admirer. Because I know enough about him to have seen that he was true, to himself and to what he wanted to create. He was…a word that I tend to dance around gingerly these days…authentic.
Let’s see how that word is defined… well, there are actually quite a few options in Merriam-Webster but I’ll choose what suits me: “Authentic: real or genuine, not copied of false. True and accurate. True to one’s own personality, spirit or character.” And interestingly, as related to music: “of a cadence: progressing from the dominant chord to the tonic.” My musicians friends, is that appropriate for his music? Tell me, I am curious.
I am ambling towards a question and feel free to answer or not as it suits you. I know that there is talk in the popular parlance of “living an authentic life” but there seems to be so much space around that idea that I am not sure what to make of it. Or maybe I have put upon it a sticky veneer that is ready to be wiped away. Mr. Reed might have shredded such a feel-good cliché on his guitar while imperceptibly nodding his head in time.
And yet, we all need comfort. Reassurance. So often we look outwards for it but if I can remember, I will tell you along with myself that it is there within, that diamond bright of true. Real or genuine, not copied or false.
What does authenticity mean to you? Does it mean the same thing as “being true”? Is it something that matters in your conscious thoughts or efforts? If I am being honest, really honest, I don’t have an easy answer myself or at least not one that I could explain quickly. But I have a feeling that it is not in the absolute nor in the gigantic. Not all of us can soar through a life but we do, each of us, have our wings.
I am going to read Ben Ratliff’s article on Lou Reed this afternoon. If you would like to join me, you can find the link here.
And I will close by saying that I did wait on Lou Reed once in New York, while he was dining outside on a warm summer evening, leaning in closely to his companion, Laurie Anderson. I am no gossip but I find it worth mentioning that while Lou Reed will remain acclaimed in music history as a “punk poet” the man I saw that evening was every inch a gentleman.
Reading your post on "authenticity" makes me recall a passage from Michael Cunningham's novel, "The Hours", in which the eighteen year old, female student/groupie of an unavoidably "Radicalized!", gender-theory-obsessed, aggressively lesbian/feminist professor decides (for some all too obviously under-examined reason) to take her teacher into some snooty-boots NYC department store to buy some ill-defined new stuff. The young girl (who's pretty and perfectly "normal" looking) stands there with her professor (who's the sort you can, for better or worse, immediately categorize from thirty yards away, if you've ever attended a school with a Women's Studies Program) as they're suddenly approached by a perfectly coiffed, immaculately made-up, wasp-waisted, smiling saleswoman in high heels and sparkling jewelry.
The young saleswoman (is that what we still call them?) makes the Big Mistake of stopping about five feet from them, looking the radical-feminist professor up and down….from crew-cut head to army-booted toe…..and then sweetly asking "May I help you, Ma'am?"
The ultra-butch, middle-aged professor looks the salesgirl throughly up&down…..and then flatly declares "Help ME?…..Bitch, you can't help yourSELF."
I hope that literary anecdote (does winning the Pulitzer Prize validate something as "literary"?) doesn't seem hopelessly tangential to your posting.
As for me? I haven't held a "real" job for 23 years, have never had children whom I've had to guide through life's hoops&mazes…….and there's any number of other reasons that, if I have a problem in this life, it's recalling that, when I venture off this property, I have to put a bridle on this business of being "authentic". In short?…if I have a problem, it's recalling that there are plenty of occasions when I have to forcefully remind myself that one has to be inauthentic at times.
I'm guess I'm just lucky in that way.
For instance?….I'm taking the dogs to their very skilled groomers in exactly half an hour. The assistant will cooingly refer to me as their "daddy" and to them as "your babies!". I will smile and nod my head and bite my tongue. The alternative, and genuine, reaction will be to tell her that these are DOGS, And I am a Human, and she is more full of shit than a Christmas goose.
But?…..I won't say it. So much for authenticity.
Level Best as Ever,
David Terry
http://www.davidterryart.com
It IS complicated and thank you for your brave response–it solidified something that was dancing around in my brain that I couldn't quite lasso: "I think I am authentic but not necessarily true to my entire nature." When I was younger, much younger and acting I certainly gave priority to "being true" in a really exigent manner that at times made me a bit of a monster…
I don't know if I agree with you V. I think you can be true and live a perfectly quiet life "under the radar"…But I also know that it is easy for me to just toss these questions out there! 🙂 It is good to think about…I see a whole lot of "being true" in your family unit…what you have created, who you are as a whole…
What a fabulous response, Mr. Laoch, right on the nose. *ouch* 😉
You would know, my authentic Heroine!
And nobody will judge you for that Loree, not in this economy. And your blog is your heart on the screen–all of it so clearly comes from the heart!!!
tehehe I most certainly do! But in asking (I know my questions were very vague), I am not so sure that it is an exalted place or one most of us remain in all the time…?
I love the image of a samurai sword cutting through the crap (sorry but it was the most polite word I could think of)–kashlam!!
Unfortunately so true, Michel. Perfectly put, thank you for that…
Your response gave me a lot to think about too, Judith. A lot of this strikes home for me as well. The mislabelling of behavior when we were too young to know for ourselves…the importance of "being true" in friendships (and that being reciprocated, VERY important to me)…what we are trying to make…lots to think about and it seems a conversation worth continuing, as we get older…