It was quite a surprise that I suddenly wanted to take pictures again. So I picked up the camera for the first time in many months, cradling it to my chest with one hand in-between the clicks, happy to see again.
That is a gift that you gave to me. Yes, you. Your comments and emails of support and understanding are like a talisman that I always have in my pocket, just in case. I thank you with all of my heart. It is freeing to know that I can share and that being ‘alone’ is an illusion.
What wasn’t surprising, not in the least, was that I would love my friend Elizabeth, La Contessa, in person as much as I have through communicating across the lines, over the years via the internet and eventually, due to her insistence, on the phone. She invited me to come out West to change my mind and then some. Maybe to shift perspective and pick up a bit of strength on the way.
I could feel the smile spreading up through my throat, across my lips to raise up my hand in a goofy wave as soon as I saw her at the terminal, waiting, searching the crowds for a redhead, possibly in a caftan. It was a recognition, a “Hello you” of a friendship made solid, something that would only intensify over the days as I fell head over heels for her and her antiques-filled (and I do mean filled) home, her charming Italian Husband, her winsome Corgi named Winston and even, astonishingly, a wise cat named Theodore (just don’t tell Ben and Kipling). That all of this was to be found in California only added to the sweetness.
It was a champagne bubble of a week filled with everything that I like.
Did that pop when I returned back to reality? It did. I realize constantly that I am in the early days yet. But, when courage has been instilled it cannot so easily be stripped.
And so too, on this Memorial Day in the States, I think of the men and women who have crossed truly frightening lines, fueled less by inspiration but something lit like freedom. I thank them as well.
“The question is not what a man can scorn, or disparage, or find fault with, but what he can love, and value, and appreciate.”
— John Ruskin
A thought that I held onto tightly on that day in February when I flew out of Paris?
There is a horizon always above the clouds and it is shining blue.
****
*For those of you stopping by because of Elizabeth’s unending kindness? Thank you so very much for being here. If this post or the links are a little too cryptic, you can find out more of my recent story by clicking here. Bienvenue…
Большое спасибо , Елена ! Я так счастлив знать , что вам нравится текст и фотографии из так далеко . Ты заставил меня улыбнуться сегодня. 🙂 И есть некоторые прекрасные фотографии на Вашем блоге тоже …
Dear Heather,
надеюсь у тебя всё будет хорошо! В твоём блоге хороши не только фотографии, но сам текст очень особенный. Рада что ты вернулась и буду ждать твоих новых рассказом даже если и не о франции. Мой английский не очень хорош, но тебя я всё равно читаю.
Елена
I haven't listened to Tori Amos in some time, Julie – off I go to do so and thank you! Yes, I criss-crossed with happiness for a week out West and it felt like home.
Anita, I wish you could have seen my eyes light up with surprise to see a response from you here! How lovely! Of course, I feel as if I already know you due to the wonderful friends that we have in common. I always make a point to read what you have to say chez Madame V (I know it should be Madame A but I prefer to call her Madame V, it sounds more mysterious).
It looks as though you have brought your generous spirit with you. Thank you for the very kind compliments…and reassurance too.
xo
Thank you Catherine for your incredible kindness. Always. I have thought about it. Right now it is still too painful to look back but I hope to write a book one day. It has been in my thoughts quite a lot.
Trying to stay on the peaceful, loving path.
Namaste,
xo
H
Yes!
Jo-Anne, do you realize that you most likely have a neighbor who reads and comments here as well? What are the chances of TWO people from Saltspring becoming Lost in Arles???
That poem is perfection.
You are a wonderful friend. You always, always understand everything perfectly. All I can do is nod my head with watery eyes, sniffly, hoping yet believing you are right. You tend to be. 😉
This is a beautiful comment.
Emily, I am learning to meditate and there are so many references to the surface of the ocean and it feels so perfect to me right now! And I get seasick! 😉 So thank you…
Hello Cynthia and thank you for your kind words of support, they are needed right now! I hope that you will like it here. There are lots of wonderful people and mutual friends too as you can see…
Welcome…!